Unbelievable

Just found stuck under one of the Young Adult shelves:

Several pieces of chewing gum and what appears to be a rather large dried snot booger.

Excuse me while I go throw up a little and then disinfect EVERYTHING.

Sometimes its fun actually

(This couple had a very thick accent, perhaps German, I'm not sure)

Customer: What is this Pride and Prejudice and Zombies?
Me: It's Jane Austen's classic Pride and Prejudice re-written as though zombies were a regular part of life when she wrote her books.
Customer: Oh. My daughter likes these Jane Austen take off books.

The customer proceeds up to the sales counter and we ring him in.

Customer: So what is a zombie?
Me: Ummmm... Like in Night of the Living Dead? It's a undead creature.
Customer: Like a vampire?
Me: Sort of, zombies eat brains though and are more mindless shuffling monster types than vampires...

This went on for a while with me trying harder and harder to explain what a zombie is.

This couple was very very nice and their question was obviously due to a language/culture issue and not stupidity or down right meanness. However, it was funny and became more and more so because we had such a hard time trying to explain. Have you ever had to try to explain something that you've just taken for granted that everyone knows and you've never really thought about before? You know what I mean then.

My Apologies

Customer: I'm looking for this book
Me: Okay, let me look it up here... Oh no, I'm afraid it's out of print.
Customer: Okay, I'd like to order it.
Me: It's out of print. That means the publisher isn't printing it anymore. I can't order it. You could try a used bookstore though, they'll probably be able to track down a copy for you.
Customer: I don't want a used one. I want a new one.
Me: They're not making new ones. It's gone out of print. I can't get a new one for you. A used store might be able to find a like new one for you though. The used bookstore in town is very good at finding things.
Customer: Why can't you just order one for me?
Me: It's gone out of print. I can't order one from the publisher which is where we order books from. I'm sorry, they're just not printing more of them.
Customer: But why?
Me: Ummm? I don't know why. Maybe they didn't sell enough to print more...
Customer: But I want it.
Me: Try the used bookstore.



It's like daycare.....
My apologies to the staff of the used bookstore in town he's coming your way...

Weirder and weirder

Customer: Do you have the new Dan Brown book?
Me: Sure. It's right here.
Customer: Oh. I want it in paperback.
Me: It's not available in paperback yet. It only came out in Hardcover a couple of weeks ago...
Customer: Well that's not right. I want it in paperback.
Me: I'm sorry but it's just not available. The publisher has published it as a hardcover and it'll probably be a year or so before it comes out in paper.
Customer: Well that's not acceptable.
Me: I'm afraid there isn't anything we can do about it ma'am. It's the publisher's call when and if a paperback comes out.
Customer: Well I want to speak to the publisher right now.
Me: Ummmm, they're not here...
Customer: Well when will they be in?
Me: They won't. They're never here. We're just a bookstore. The Random House offices are in New York I think....
Customer: Well then why do you have their books?
Me: Huh? That's what bookstores do... we get books from the publishers to people who want to buy them.
Customer: Oh...


?????