I wonder if I'll hear about this......

Customer: You can't have this book here.
Me: Pardon me?
Customer: You can't have this book.
Me: I don't think I understand you.
Customer: You can't sell this book here.

Customer points to Under the Banner of Heaven

Me: Okay..... why not?
Customer: It's offensive to my religion.
Me: What?
Customer: I find it offensive to my religion.
Me: Okay. Well I suggest you don't purchase it.
Customer: You're not going to remove it from the shelf?
Me: Ummm. No.
Customer: Well I find it offensive.
Me: As I said. Don't buy it.

Do I know you?

This is a customer I'm sure I've never seen before.

Customer: I'm looking for a good book
Me: Okay. What kind of thing do you like?
Customer: I like that last one that I read.
Me: Okay. What was that?
Customer: You know, that last one there that I read.
Me: I'm afraid I don't know what the last book you read was.
Customer: It was that one about the people in Africa.
Me: Okay...... was it fiction or a true story?
Customer: It was that last one there that I read.



I never did figure out why he thought I would know what the last book he had read was. We did send him home with a copy of War Child by Emmanual Jal. I hope he likes it.

You're not helping

Customer: Can you order books?
Me: Yes.
Customer: I guess I have to tell you the name of the book.
Me: That's usually helpful yes.
Customer: It's published by Little Brown.
Me: Okay.
Customer: It's like $22.
Me: Okay. Do you know the title?
Customer: It's Blue.
Me: Okay. Do you happen to know the title?
Customer: The author is Wallace I think.
Me: Okay, I can try to search by author for you.
Customer: It's called Infinite Jest.



This was one of those nice enough but clueless exchanges. Why couldn't she just give me the title to begin with?

Good Luck with that

Customer: I'm looking for the new Robert Jordan book.
Me: In the Wheel of Time books?
Customer: Yes. The 12th one.
Me: It's not out yet. They did get someone to finish it but not yet. The 11th is the newest.
Customer: It's suppose to be out.
Me: Ummm, I can check and see if the publisher has a release date for it but it's not available yet.
Customer: Yes it is.
Me: Okay...... Well, we don't have it then.
Customer: Well when will you have it.
Me: When it's published. I don't know when that will be yet.
Customer: It's out now. I want you to order it.
Me: I can't order it. It's not available to order yet. When the publisher sets a publishing date and makes it available to order we will have it in.
Customer: I'm going to write to the author and complain that you don't have it and you're gonna be in trouble.



What???? Really?
This is messed up on so many levels, not the least of which is the fact that the author is dead.

I'm a little shook up.

I had a man come in just now with a book that he said was given to him for Christmas. He had no receipt and the cover of the book had black marker scribbled all over the pricing. He wanted me to return it. I explained that that wasn't possible.

He then started getting angry.

Customer: I'm not into books and this one looks like crap anyway. It's garbage. So you're not going to give me anything for it?
Me: Sir, I can't. It's all marked up and even if I could buy it from you we can't sell it in that condition. I'm sure the library would be thrilled to take it if you really don't want it.
Customer: If it's got no value then I'm just going to throw it out.
Me: Please don't do that. The library would be so grateful for it.
Customer: No. If you won't give me anything for it it doesn't have any value and it's going in the garbage.

Then he started grabbing handfuls of pages and ripping them out and throwing them down on the counter. Then he just stormed out.


I'm actually still shaking a bit. It was a little scary.

Some days I wonder.......

This was a phone conversation I just had

Customer: Do you have paperback books?
Me: Ummm, yes?
Customer: How much are they?
Me: They range depending on the book.... They go from around $10 up to $60 or more.
Customer: Oh. So they're not all the same?
Me: ummm, no.
Customer: I'm talking about paperbacks here. You know. Paperbacks.
Me: Paperback is pretty broad sir. There are paperbacks in every section of the store. Are you looking for the little fiction pocket sized books?
Customer: Paperbacks. I can't believe you don't know what I am talking about.

Then he hung up on me.

Is it me?

We are not a babysitting service!

Quit leaving your small children in bookstores while you go shopping someplace else. We don't know who they are suppose to leave with or not. It's actually not okay for them to sit with their Doritos and read books while you're off doing whatever it is you're doing. NOT OK. Try the library, they might have programs for this kind of thing.