So you'd like it NOW?

Customer: Do you have The Polar Express and the Velveteen Rabbit in stock?
Me: I think so, let me check the computer. We've got lots of The Polar Express.... I'm checking on the Velveteen Rabbit.

At this point the husband comes over

CustHusband: Do they have them?
Customer: She said they have The Polar Express but it would be NICE if she got it.

WOW. REALLY? Holy give me a moment. I'm Still looking for the stock for the other book it's not like I've abandoned them after saying yes there's one somewhere here in the store you go find it Mawahhahahaha.

Stubborn doesn't always mean right.

Customer: I'm looking for a silver book by some guy who's Norwegian.
Me: How about Stieg Larsson's The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest?
Customer: Is he Norwegian?
Me: No. He was Swedish but the book is silver and very popular so it's probably the one.
Customer: No. I need the silver book by the Norwegian guy.


Needless to say we didn't find it.

Giving tourists a bad name

Customer: Do you have learn Spanish sets?
Me: Sure, over here.
Customer: Oh, these have cds?
Me: Yes, most of the sets come with a cd and the books. That way you can hear and see the lesson.
Customer: Oh, I don't need to hear it to learn it. I'll just know.
Me: Okay. I guess you don't need a set then. These are all the Spanish / English dictionaries here.


Okay then.

Phone Etiquette?

I answer the phone:
_________ Books. _______ Speaking.

I hear:
Never let me go.

I say:
Pardon me?

I hear an woman say in the rudest possible way:
Do you have the book about the movie Never Let Me Go or not?

I say:
We are out of stock but we have more coming in this week.

I hear:
"Click"


Can we make phone etiquette a mandatory class in high school? PLEASE?

ARG!

Have you ever noticed that it's always the people who go on ad nauseum about how dangerous it is for them to be in a bookstore and how much they read and how many books they have that are always the ones who leave without buying anything? Usually after they've followed you around the store for half an hour barely taking enough time to breath as they talk and talk and talk and talk......
Not that that just a happened. Excuse me while I go lock myself in a quiet room for a few minutes...

I see your logic but no.

Customer: I need an English/French dictionary.
Me: Sure not a problem.

I lead the customer over to the dual language dictionaries

Me: Here you are. There are quite a few to choose from.
Customer: These all say French/English dictionaries. I need an English/French dictionary.
Me: French/English or English/French it doesn't matter they're the same.
Customer: But how can I use a French/English dictionary if I don't already know French?
Me: They all have both French to English definitions and English to French definitions. Otherwise, you'd have to buy two books to make it work.

At least she had some fairly decent logic to lead up to her confusion....

I weep for our school system

Cust: Do you have a photocopier?
Me: Not really no. Why?
Cust: I want to photocopy this book so I don't have to buy it.
Me: What? You want me to photocopy the book?
Cust: Well not the whole book, just most of it.
Me: Ummm, you know that's not okay right?
Cust: Oh no, it's fine. I'm a teacher. I can photocopy anything.

After standing with my mouth agape for a moment.... (and I'll admit maybe not one of my best days)

Me: I'm pretty sure you're only allowed to copy up to 10% out of any particular book for classroom use. However, that's not really the point. Asking me to photocopy it here, in the store, so you don't have to buy it? Wow. Now would you like me to ring that up for you or are you finished here?